Yo Mamma
Your mama so fat when she opens the Fridge it says - “I give up…”
Your mama so fat she got a new gig at the Cinema…she works as the screen.
Your mama so fat small objects orbit her.
Your mama so fat she has more crack then Harlem!
Your mama so fat she once told me ‘I could eat a horse’…believe me, she wasn’t kidding!
Your mama so fat when she sits around the house, she sits around the house!
Your mama so fat she wakes up in sections!
Your mama so fat she deep fries her toothpaste.
Your mama so fat she sat on a Nintendo Gamecube and it turned into a gameboy.
Your mama so fat she makes Kiko the Whale look like a Smartie.
Your mama so fat NASA plan to use her to shore up the hole in the Ozone layer.
Your mama so fat she was measured at 38-26-36 and that was just the left arm…
Your mama so fat she make olympic sumo wrestlers look anorexic.
Your mama so fat when I tell her to haul ass, she gotta make two trips.
Your mama so fat she’s got her own area code!
Your mama so fat even Bill Gates couldn’t pay for her liposuction!
Your mama so fat she uses a mattress for a tampon.
Your mama so fat her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs!
Your mama so fat when she farted she launched herself into orbit.
Your mama so fat she lost a game at Hide&Seek only cos I spotted her…behind Mount Everest.
Your mama so fat when I had to swerve to avoid hitting her on the road I ran out of Petrol.
Your mama so fat she could be the eighth continent.
Your mama so fat she nearly put Safeway out of business.
Your mama so fat stunt agencies use her as an air mattress.
Your mama so fat the only thing that’s attracted to her is gravity.
Your mama so fat when she step on the Weight Scales it says…”to be continued…”
Your mama so fat she once went on a seafood diet…whenever she saw food she ate it!
Your mama so fat folk exercise by jogging around her!
Your mama so fat when she bends over, we enter Daylight Saving Time.
Your mama so fat she was in the Daily Record last week on page 5, 6, 7, 8, and 9.
Your mama so fat the circus use her as a trampoline.
Your mama so fat her Uni graduation photo was an aerial.
Your mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller.
Your mama so fat when she auditioned for a part in Raiders of the Lost Ark she got the part of the big Rolling Ball.
Your mama so fat she make Jabba the Hutt look anorexic.
Your mama so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said “Taxi!”.
Your mama so fat people jog around her for exercise.
Your mama so fat her fave food is seconds.
Your mama so fat she got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets.
Your mama so fat her belt size is Equator.
Your mama so fat she eats Desert out of a Trash Can lid.
Your mama so fat when she has wants someone to shake her hand, she has to give directions!
Your mama so fat she goes to a restaurant, looks at the menu and says “okay!”.
Your mama so fat she fell off a boat and the Captain yelled, “Land Ahoy!!!”.
Your mama so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop!
Your mama so fat she wears an ‘X’ jacket and Copters attempt to land on her.
Your mama so fat she fell in love and broke it.
Your mama so fat she shows up on radar.
Your mama so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up.
Your mama so fat she needs a map to find her butt.
Your mama so fat she fell into the Grand Canyon….and got stuck!
Your mama so fat she was floating in the ocean and spain claimed her for then new world.
Your mama so fat she wears an asteroid belt.
Your mama so fat her Passport photo says ‘Picture is continued overleaf’.
Your mama so fat she has TB … 2 bellys.
Your mama so fat she’s once, twice, three times a lady.
Your mama so fat when she goes to Gap the only thing she can fit into is the Dressing Room.
Your mama so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors.
Your mama so fat you haveta roll over twice to get off her…
Your mama so fat the highway patrol made her wear “Caution! Wide Turn”.
Your mama so fat she tripped over on 4th Ave, she landed on 12th.
Your mama so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone.
Your mama so fat when she wants someone to shake her hand, she has to give directions!